The Lovell Family Happenings

My days and weeks are running together.  Things that happen a week and two weeks ago seem like yesterday.  And at other times it seems like several weeks have passed.

Last week is a blur so I'll start with 2 weeks ago when we found out about Cole's last prognosis.  On Saturday when we went to the temple we came back to Cedar and Cole received another blessing confirming what was said in the first blessing.  This helped us regroup and continue in faith that he could overcome the cancer.  A few days later Ethan checked Cole's oxygen levels and they were up.!!  Medically this didn't make sense.  The next day they had him turn off his oxygen for 1/2 an hour and then checked the oxygen levels again.  The levels were still up!!
By the end of the week Cole started getting sick and vomiting about once or twice a day.  But they changed his pain medication and we were waiting for things to improve.
Saturday October 5th Kjerstin was having a Birthday Party for Sophie.  She is now a big 2!  We all headed over to Enterprise to party!  My Mom and Dad were able to come down and they beat everyone to the party and had some time alone with Kjerstin and her little family.  Grandma Mary was a big help to Kjerstin putting on the last touches for the party.  When we got there, after listening to the first session of conference, the party was just beginning.  I walked in and went over to Grandpa Newell and gave him a hug. He didn't look very good.  His color was not quite right and he was having a hard time catching his breath.  He had just been up and was trying to get his breath back.  I talked to him for a few minutes and then went to help Kjerstin with "duck , duck, goose".   Sophie then started opening her gifts.  Dad was still uncomfortable.  We opened up the doors to get the air circulating and it seemed to help Dad some.  He was able to relax a bit.  Grandma kept asking him if he wanted to leave.  He wanted to stay for a while but after a few minutes he decided they should go.  Duke and Kurtis helped him out to the car.  When Dad is having a hard time breathing it usually helps when they get into the car and get the air conditioner blowing on high then he is able to relax and start breathing better.  This is what we figured would happen and he would be OK.  As Mom ran back into the house to get her things and say good bye I leaned into the car and said good bye to Dad and he was feeling bad that he couldn't stay.  I told him that he had done all he could and that is was good that he had been able to come.  Mom came out I guided them out of the driveway and I waved good bye.  Dad passed away on their way to Cedar.  His passing was peaceful.  He didn't struggle for air as he thought he would when the end came.  This was a blessing for him and all of us that he was able to just slip away.  Looking back, as hard as it was for Mom to be alone with Dad as he passed, she knows he didn't struggle and this is a comfort.
The next week is the blur.  Getting ready for the funeral was comforting during the times we were reminiscing, hard when we had to face the reality of what we were planning.
As the viewings took place there was such an amazing amount of support.  And even before the viewing many family and friends came by the house to give support and love and lots of food. :)
The funeral went very well.  The weather was beautiful, a nice fall day Dad would have enjoyed.

To catch up with Cole... it is very difficult.  Last year it was easy compared to this go around because I knew basically what his routine was, when he would be feeling really sick and when a few good days were coming.  This is a whole new ball game.  It is a real roller coaster.  His lungs seem to be staying about the same.  He seems to breath a little heavier now but he says they seem about the same.  The hard thing to watch is that he is his left leg and foot are numb again.  He has lost a lot of weight and he is very weak.  When I get worried Cole tells me, "Mom, faith and fear cannot exist at the same time."  So we are choosing FAITH!